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Very Hot Topic (More than 25 Replies) - LNF story book - (Read 18,195 times)
Nox
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #20 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 6:49pm
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... in a deep bass voice, "My name is Sue.  How do you do?"  Suffice it to say ... I dropped the cookies.  And what a pity too ... they were chocolate chunk cookies made from an old family Swahili recipe ... which included of all things ... blond wart hair.  Whoda' thunk?

Nox
  

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Fredonia3k
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #21 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 7:16pm
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As taken aback as I was, my subconscious quickly reminded me of the five-second rule. I dove to the floor keeping a mental count. I don't abide by many rules, but those I follow get my strictest adherence. I managed to pick up four of the cookies before the buzzer went off in my head. Mind you, this was an NBA buzzer, none of that NCAA buzzing-time-included nonsense. As I stood back up and tried to get Johnny Cash out of my head, I said to Sue...
  
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TinyDancer
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #22 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 7:55pm
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I said "Sue", that is funny, "My name is Sue, too".  Sue, looked truly troubled now.  But, Sue was no lightweight.  She was a bonafide member of Smersh.  She had bedded down with none other than James Bond, and she was now turning those lazer eyes upon me and my cookies....
  
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Hair Looms From The Attic
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #23 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 9:29pm
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The tension was cut by a passing badger. His old world charm put us at ease..I lit a tuba and offered her one. She declined, instead lighting a Saxohphone. Things were going well, The night was young, the band was playing our song until Myrtle Prong entered the room...
  

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Nox
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #24 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 9:58pm
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... and said, "Hi, I'm Myrtle Prong."  Instantly, At's (Adonis type) mind had a light come on and from his impressive lips came this astute comment ... "Who is Myrtle Prong?"
  

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TinyDancer
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #25 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 10:13pm
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She laughed a husky laugh that made one think of German discos in the eighties, all smoke and dark, hot beer.  "Who is Myrtle Prong?" she sneered as she brought a Havana cigar to her collagen injected lips, "I am the only woman that ever went out with James Bond that had a wart...with blond hair coming out of it".
  
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #26 - Mar 29th, 2008 at 10:33pm
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"That woman was me" said AT (Adonis Type) in a voice similar to Karl Malden on a hot afternoon. But with a puff of her Cuban cigar she disapeared through a facade of cigar smoke and large potted plants. "Oh how I shall miss that man of mine"..
  

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Solar PHD  Liberal Agitator
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #27 - Mar 30th, 2008 at 10:10am
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Quote:
"That woman was me" said AT (Adonis Type) in a voice similar to Karl Malden on a hot afternoon. But with a puff of her Cuban cigar she disapeared through a facade of cigar smoke and large potted plants. "Oh how I shall miss that man of mine"..


A confused lot she was, as she faded off into the distance I noticed a Quran tucked under her arm.
This raised some curiosity because of of her deep voice and beard, I knew that Islum didn't accept the gay lifestyle.
So I decided to follow her, which was easy due to the fact that she smoked one of the worst cigars I had ever smelled.
As I turned the corner, I realized she was up to no good. She had just entered Tiny Dancers Boutique (a ballet fitting store) I followed her she mulled around for sometime then suddenly exited the back door.
Not suspecting I was following her, she quickly ducked into Bert & Harry's BOMBS R US store.
A rather quaint little shop that .......
  
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Nox
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #28 - Mar 30th, 2008 at 11:19am
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... that specialized in Frog legs.  And the top of the line legs belonged to none other than Kermit.  Yes, the one and only Helmud Kermit ... the bank officer where the pidgeon dropings were stored.  In the background was a familiar tune ... and children were singing ... "it's a small world afterall ... " but there was an uncanny bass feature uncommon to childrens voices.  Alas it was Froggy of little rascals fame.  But then we are in Bombs R Us.

Nox
  

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bama_beau
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Re: - LNF story book -
Reply #29 - Mar 31st, 2008 at 12:02am
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Nox wrote on Mar 30th, 2008 at 11:19am:
... that specialized in Frog legs.  And the top of the line legs belonged to none other than Kermit.  Yes, the one and only Helmud Kermit ... the bank officer where the pidgeon dropings were stored.  In the background was a familiar tune ... and children were singing ... "it's a small world afterall ... " but there was an uncanny bass feature uncommon to childrens voices.  Alas it was Froggy of little rascals fame.  But then we are in Bombs R Us.

Nox


I furtively watched Froggy from behind a pile of discarded Pez dispensers, while he fitted his old white cat with small vest full of explosives and a keffiyeh.  As I watched in amazement, Froggy reached over his styrofoam PBR beer cooler, picked up a beautician's mirror, and held it up for the cat to view its reflected likeness.  It was then that I began giggling, giving myself away, and causing Froggy to turn quickly, and say . . .
  
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