Nipplespinge. Are you familiar with the story of Nipplespinge? Nipplespinge was a quiet little planet in a rural part of the galaxy. For many millenia the people of Nipplespinge lived happy content lives. One day however a man from Arktis, a planet voted most picturesque planet seven years running pointed out that the name Nipplespinge is very silly. Furthermore he pointed out that the name Nipplespinge translates into “Silly name for a silly planet”.

The people of Nipplespinge were devastated. Confidence lost and a pall settled over the once happy planet. Historians hurriedly searched through the dusty books of history to find the origin of the name, and who was the creator. A person was found and the angry people of Nipplespinge searched in earnest for his last remaining descendent. A middle aged man who worked in a transport cafe in the industrial district of the planet. The man was subsequently dragged into the street and shot very well. He died almost instantly.

A “rename Nipplespinge” campaign was hastily created and for six weeks there were entries and debates until finally a name was chosen. “Cretenia” . The winner was awarded the $15,000 grand prize and all was happy once again on the planet formerly known as Nipplespinge. So caught up were they in their renewed happiness that they never thought to research the translation of the name “Cretenia”. Unfortunately for the good people of the newly crowned Cretenia The name means “Smelly Wombat Testicle Mincer”...

Side note: The winner of the Rename Nipplespinge campaign was not from the planet formerly known as Nipplespinge but from a small picturesque planet called Arktis...

Such a tragic fable, surely there must be a moral. But I can't for the life of me figure it out.