Liberty News Forum
Political News Forum - Let your opinions be heard on current news and politics. Not for wimps!
Political Opinion Page - Recent Posts - LNF Forums LNF in the Age of Empowerment!
Christian Forum - Religion Forum - Entertainment - Sports Forum
Military - A1 News Page - Computers Tech - Financial News - Bunker - Presidential Tracking Poll
The House - Off the Wall News - Page 2 - Rasmussen Reports Polls - Chat Room
Liberty News ForumLNF Forums HereJokes and Humor › Phil's scrotum
Page Index Toggle Pages: 1 Send TopicPrint
Normal Topic Phil's scrotum (Read 261 times)
Poor Wallys Almanac
Hardhat
Conservative Caucus
*****
Offline

Cunning... is but the
low mimic of wisdom ~Plato

Posts: 20,712
Location: Upstate New York
Joined: Feb 24th, 2008
Gender: Male
Phil's scrotum
Feb 23rd, 2018 at 7:16am
Print Post  
Phil's scrotum
The Best Story of the Year:

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers.
Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Phil, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagine the pain that poor Phil must have experienced.
"Phil was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain.
" We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Phil's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."
Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Phil.
"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Phil is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely."
All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.

A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.

He said, "I'm Phil."
The entire congregation held its breath. "I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."
  

" The few will always act like the few.”

–Machiavelli

Back to top
WWWAIM  
IP Logged
 
Jasmine
LNF Speaker
LNF Bunker
Conservative Caucus
*****
Offline

God Bless America!

Posts: 33,434
Location: Hawaii
Joined: Jul 28th, 2008
Gender: Female
Re: Phil's scrotum
Reply #1 - Feb 23rd, 2018 at 5:16pm
Print Post  
Ha ha! Cheesy
  

Mar 13th, 2018 at 11:23am: "I think a #16 seed will upset a #1 seed in the NCAA Tournament."

Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
BowHunter
LNF Speaker
LNF Bunker
*****
Offline


Posts: 19,047
Location: America
Joined: Dec 5th, 2013
Gender: Male
Re: Phil's scrotum
Reply #2 - Feb 23rd, 2018 at 6:01pm
Print Post  
Balzac made that joke...
  

When Q hears gallop noises he doesn't think zebras; he thinks there's a Democrat behind a curtain, making gallop noises.
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Page Index Toggle Pages: 1
Send TopicPrint
 
Liberty News ForumLNF Forums HereJokes and Humor › Phil's scrotum

LNF Home - Political Opinion Page
LNF Forums

Christian Forum - Religion Forum - Sports Forum - Entertainment - House
Military, History - Cooking and Crafts - Creative Writing
Off the Wall News - Science Forum - Tech Gadgets - Financial News - Humor
Bunker - Page 2 - Page 3 - Page 4 - Chat Room





Drudge Report - News Max - Rush Limbaugh - FrontpageMag
Advertise on the LNF - Twitter LNF - LNF Archive - LNF News
LNF Blog
News and Political Links
Political Blogs
Add your website or blog
Political Columnists
Political Humor
A1 News Page
David Limbaugh
Political Frog
Conservatives Directory
President Trump Approval Poll
Presidential Party Election Poll News forum posting, privacy policy and member rules